Deciding to become friends with someone beyond the age of 13 is a tricky task. I recently met a woman who I think is fairly cool, smart, funny and with that requisite biting edge I look for in everyone. We started with a working relationship but have moved on to a form of relationship between accquaintance and friend.
I want to be this woman's friend. There, I said it. Making this happen requires many steps - it is often more difficult and time consuming than hooking a guy. At least with men, I can use my feminine wiles (yes, I do have them). With women, you need to make sure you have something in common, are not jealous of one another, and are at essentially the same social level.
Then there is always the risk that the woman is one of those women who don't have many female friends. (What is with those girls??) The hardest part is making someone open to the idea of adding another friend to their roster. Most people are pretty set after their mid twenties. They've got the following friends all lined up:
- the best friend
- the friend who they've known since childhood
- the crazy party friend who is up for anything
- the kind, nice friend who will coddle
- the tough love friend who will set it straight
- the friends they have through a boyfriend/husband
- the friend they don't really want anymore, but feel guilty about ditching
- the work friend
- the filler friends
...and most women aren't thinking about adding anyone else. Or if they do, she had better be really great.
Now, obviously, I'm really great - so I just have to delicately increase email frequency, drop casual invites here and there and wait. She'll see the light.