I like Christmas. I wish I had more time to do Christmas right, but I always enjoy it when it arrives. There are a few things that I don't understand though.
- Why do people hire designers to decorate their homes and trim their trees?
Isn't the whole point of this to be a family tradition and something to do together? I recently spent 5 hours in someone else's home decorating for them. They weren't even home. I was in charge of the tree. This just seems wrong. I was directed to decorate with a pattern - all the ornaments were the same colour. None were made of styrofoam or popcorn. Not a one was colourful or homemade or some weird "ornament" made from paperclips.
Many rich folks want their homes to be show-worthy, which they achieve by sucking out the chintz and kitsch. Their trees look like department store displays. Who wants that? I can appreciate when you're just starting out, it will take a while to amass unique ornaments, but there is something so cold about a perfect tree. I much prefer to walk into my home with that creepy Santa mask that my mom made at craft group (circa 1992) and see a tree trimmed with random ornaments that mean something. Or see those reindeer craft projects that my brother started, but didn't finish.
This year, my grandparents stopped by to help us and we put them in charge of the strings of beads. It's pretty amusing, but we wouldn't think of changing it. It's a memory now.
- Why do people send Christmas cards with just their signatures in them?
When so few people actually send mail at all throughout the year, everyone loves to get Christmas cards. But, when I open a card from a friend and see just their signature, I really want to throw it away. What's the point? Would it kill you to write something more personal? You're not my lawyer or dentist who sends out token cards - even he tells me to floss! You're my friend - say something! Is it that people are lazy? They've already done most of the hard work, thinking of a sentence or two should be a piece of fruitcake.
I send out cards every year and, yes, it can be tedious and I sometimes repeat things, but I would never send out a form signature card like that. Maybe I'm being too hard on people. Whatevs.
-Why don't people recognize Home Alone as one of the classic Christmas films? I haven't seen It's A Wonderful Life or Miracle on 34th Street or even Lampoon all the way through, but I don't ever miss Home Alone. My friend Jessica and I used to recite every line. It's completely hilarious and has the following gems:
- Catherine O'Hara
- "Keep the change, ya filthy animal"
- Daniel Stern as the best bumbling crook
- "Jimmy, stop that boy!"
See it again for the first time: