Monday, May 18, 2009

Victoria Day Reflection

I'm beginning to resent the saying "Live each day like it's your last". It's so trite, and it just makes people feel bad about how they're already spending their day. "Make each day count" - there's another one. So, if I decide that I want to laze around all day and do nothing, does that day not count? It's condescending needlepoint philosophy.

Today, for instance, - should I feel bad that I spent the day watching movies, talking to friends on the phone and generally being all-around lazy? I ate two pieces of chocolate cake, didn't get out of my pyjamas until 4pm and had a passive-aggressive spat with my cell phone's texting capabilities. Is there anything wrong with spending a holiday Monday that way? Was it a waste?

However, I did venture out once today to take a walk in the park - an activity I talked myself into as a result of those stupid sayings. I often have the feeling that everyone else in the world is making more out of their long weekend than I am. So, I went for a walk....and it turned out to be sublime.

I thought about living today as if it were my last. As I walked around the park in the 4:30pm sunshine, listening to "Then You Can Tell Me Goodbye" by The Casinos, in my favourite sweater and sunglasses, I felt a peace. Today could be my last day and I would be okay with that.

I have no outstanding ill will or issues with anyone. I am loved. I am liked. I have a full life and I am completely content with who I've turned out to be. I laid down on the grass and thought the kinds of things one thinks when they are high. I squinted into the sun and smiled. If today were to be my last day and this is the way I spent it, I'm okay with that.

Although, if I had actually known this was it, I would have had a third piece of cake.

2 comments:

  1. "The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time"
    -Bertrand Russell

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