Tuesday, May 17, 2011

I'm All Atwitter

I recently joined Twitter. There is no end to the forms of social media and technology that I am now willing to explore. I'm bursting into this decade with a force - there's no stopping me. Look out MP3s - you're next.

I joined to follow a friend who writes about ridiculous statements in online dating profiles (@badprofiles) and then I added Kelly Oxford who says all sort of awesome stuff like "Has anyone told Avril Lavigne she has money?" and "I told my brother he looks like Tobias Funke and he unfriended me on Facebook :("

So I now have a Twitter profile. I do not tweet - I can barely keep up with this blog, but for some reason I have 2 followers. They stand to be disappointed.

However, I've been thinking and these are the types of things I would tweet:

- I just saw a pregnant hooker give money to her pimp on my way to trivia.

- How do people know when gas prices are going to rise? Every time this guy tells everyone on Facebook and I always sort of think he's a savant.

- Noooo! I have a party on the 22nd and I'm in charge of balloons and 3 dozen cannoli. The apocalypse doesn't really go with theme.
- Today I had a waitress named Charm and a woman named Nivea gave me a pedicure. I'm now looking for a chef named Pork Chop and a something named Something More Clever.

- I thought the whole point of you owning a Maserati is that I would never have to be stuck behind you.

- It looks like there was a wedding in my backyard and I wasn't invited.

Yeah, I should just stick to the blog.

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